Barack Obama Gets Honest About Marriage Struggles with Michelle: “I Was in a Deep Deficit”
Even the most iconic couples go through it — and Barack Obama is keeping it real about what life has been like with Michelle after the White House years.
During a recent Q&A at Hamilton College, the former president opened up about the challenges he’s faced in his marriage since leaving office, admitting, “I was in a deep deficit with my wife.” And yes, he really said that.
Barack told the students that after eight intense years in the White House, filled with non-stop stress, scrutiny, and schedules, he realized his relationship with Michelle had taken a hit. “I’ve been trying to dig myself out of that hole by doing occasionally fun things,” he joked — but we’re pretty sure there’s some truth behind the humor.
The candid moment came as he answered a question from Hamilton College President Steven Tepper, who asked what Obama’s been up to lately. Barack shared that he spends most of his time working with the Obama Foundation and finishing the second volume of his presidential memoirs, which he described as being “like writing 50 term papers.”
(We believe it. If A Promised Land taught us anything, it’s that Barry likes to write.)
But it’s his comments about marriage that really had people leaning in.
The Obamas, who’ve been married since 1992, have long been seen as one of America’s most inspirational power couples — smart, stylish, affectionate, and seemingly unshakable. So hearing Barack admit that post-presidency life hasn’t exactly been a romantic walk in the park? Kind of refreshing. And real.
It’s also raised eyebrows because, truth be told, Michelle hasn’t been seen with Barack much in 2025.
In just the past month, he was spotted courtside at a Clippers game, out to dinner in L.A., and even attending Jimmy Carter’s funeral — all without Michelle by his side. She also skipped Donald Trump’s 2025 inauguration (though let’s be honest… understandable).
So, of course, the internet is buzzing.
“Are Barack and Michelle okay?”
“Did she finally take that vacation she always deserved?”
“Is this what happens when your husband becomes America’s favorite man for 8 years?”
Look, let’s not jump to conclusions. Michelle has always been vocal about the sacrifices she made during Barack’s presidency — often putting her own career, time, and energy on pause for the sake of his political path. Her memoir Becoming even detailed some of the tension they navigated while raising a family under the global spotlight.
So if Michelle’s now reclaiming her time (and space)? That’s called balance.
And if Barack’s just now realizing he’s got some romantic back-pay to make up for? That’s called growth.
One thing’s for sure: behind every fairytale love story is work, and the Obamas are no exception. But if anyone can weather a “deep deficit” and come out stronger?
It’s these two.
